Good Morning ❤️
It looks like such a lovely day today. The sun is shinning and I have been baking 😂
We have peanut butter and banana muffins, mango & goji berries flackjacks yum! 😋
I love that baking helps to calm my mind and I really need that right now!
Life continues to throw challenges at us and even when I think we are all happy, it takes one comment, from a private conversation and BOOM! I’m the villain! I guess families are complicated!
Still, life goes on and adjust I will. I am not having the best of times mentally at the moment and am struggling to get through the day so I think I will have to focus on my health and well being!
I have been seeing the psychologist for a bit now and it surprises me that when I arrived at the Cardinal Clinic and sit, I immediately become tearful. It feels like there and only there I can focus on “me” and how I feel.
I have to try and find a way of living with this cancer and a healthy way. Over the years I have been watching how others deal with it and we all have very different ways, none of them are “wrong” we just do what we need to do to get through this!
We have “Perky Sue” she is very positive, very much in control of her life and her cancer. She says that she is is charge of her life and no cancer will bring her down. I think we all know a Perky Sue!
Perky Sue is amazing and vibrant and is fun to be around however I suspect that in those dark long hours of the night, she gives herself a talking to as this way of coping with cancer is unsustainable for a long period of time.
We have “In denial Dave” who doesn’t quite accept that he has cancer, doesn’t call it cancer. It’s an inconvenience to him. He puts hours and hours into keeping fit and fuelling his body with good nutritious foods.
He thinks by doing this that he has the best chance of staying alive…. maybe he has, maybe he hasn’t, we all know cancer is a dick and will do whatever it wants to do and take who ever it wants as well!
There is also “Distracted Diane”. She hasn’t had it good at all, lots of surgeries, lots of chemo and radiotherapy, so what does she do? She sets up her own charity/foundation in order to help others.
She does this to take her mind off her own painful treatment and by helping others she can feel that she is doing something useful..
We then have someone who seems to be a bit of an Eeyore…. “Glum Gordon” Everything is a bit doom and gloom for Gordon. He can’t quite be happy just plodding along, yes he has had awful treatments, I’m not belittling that in any way.
It’s just their cancer is the worse cancer in the world and no amount of trying to cheer them up will help.
“Muddled Mary” is the next character, she tries hard at being an advocate, at helping others. She is always there to support this who need some help. Friendly and happy, will drop what she is doing just to help.
But poor Mary has moments of complete insanity, thinking she is worthless and she shouldn’t still be here, that she has no right to feel down or unhappy. She puts so much into helping other people that she has nothing left for herself.
Mary puts on her happy face every day and continues with life, no matter how pained she is in her life!
I guess what I am trying to get across is that there is no right or won’t way to deal with cancer, however deal with it we must and whatever you have to do to get yourself through the day, do it!
Remember that we are all going through the same intense feelings, the same worries and anxieties we just all deal with it differently and maybe by speaking about it we can help each other through some of the more shitty times.
Wishing you all a wonderful day, let me know what other types of people you see in life, I love people watching ❤️
Love and hugs
Anita
#kickingcancersbutt
My Big Fat British Bladder Tumour 